Matt (00:00.767)
Hello, welcome to Bobgord at Plot holes. I wanted to be very not robotics just to show the robot overlords are well, I mean, that's what an AI would do, wouldn't it?

Luciano (00:05.39)
What the fuck happened there?

Spencer (00:06.193)
love it.

Luciano (00:10.126)
that you can.

Spencer (00:11.221)
that you're not an AI?

Luciano (00:15.66)
Yeah, it would.

Spencer (00:17.525)
EAR!

Matt (00:20.411)
I am a human male. I mean, human.

Spencer (00:24.319)
I'm

Luciano (00:27.374)
Yeah.

Luciano (00:32.492)
Max Headstrom, that's an AI from the night.

Spencer (00:33.811)
What's up?

Matt (00:37.921)
Well played, sir. Now, with me as always, Spencer.

Spencer (00:38.463)
Timely references.

Luciano (00:40.652)
Yes.

Spencer (00:44.021)
Spencer bleep blarp

Luciano (00:46.644)
Bleep merp. Yeah I guess I'm here wherever this is.

Matt (00:46.783)
Lucia, Luciano.

And Chris has been taken by the robots. That's why they're not here. They're focusing on him.

Luciano (00:55.062)
Yeah, he's become a battery.

Matt (00:58.259)
No telling. Yeah, he's me. He's Matrixed. Leap blorp indeed. We watched, God, The Lord of the Rings. thank you.

Spencer (00:59.571)
His programming is being uploaded as we speak. Bleep, LARP.

Luciano (01:05.102)
You

Spencer (01:09.235)
Wait.

Matt (01:17.493)
The Lord of the Rings.

Spencer (01:17.525)
Beautiful.

Matt (01:22.783)
The War of the Rohirrim

Luciano (01:25.25)
there you go, you nailed it.

Spencer (01:25.781)
Come on, when that music started to the beginning of movie, you were like, I'm so in.

Matt (01:36.275)
Yep. Hey, is that your one thing you liked about this movie?

Spencer (01:39.093)
Fucking I- Yes.

Luciano (01:40.768)
Okay, that's a good segue.

Matt (01:44.385)
Professional as always. So Spencer liked the music from a different set of movies in this movie.

Luciano (01:48.781)
Hahaha

Spencer (01:49.085)
I just liked that it was like, it actually made me feel like it was in the same world as the other Lord of the Rings movies. For a time, for a time. It felt like those older Lord of the Rings movies, the great ones, if it was made in Japan.

Luciano (01:58.231)
Okay, that's fair.

Luciano (02:09.144)
but also in the US.

Spencer (02:10.933)
What? Yes, like if it was like the Japanese animators making an American version of Lord of the Rings after watching Game of Thrones

Matt (02:17.025)
Americanized.

Luciano (02:20.034)
Yeah.

Yes, that's perfect. That's perfect.

Matt (02:24.641)
That's fair. Since god, since Spencer has already given us his one thing he loves, Luciano.

Luciano (02:35.864)
So we're talking about this in the pre-show, I think my favorite, unfortunately, my favorite part of this movie is the beginning where they show the map and then it transitions from the map into the mountains and it's photorealistic. And I was like, holy shit, this is amazing. Why are people complaining about the animation in this movie? And then the rest of the movie happens and I'm like, that's why.

Matt (02:52.895)
Yep, gorgeous. Yeah. Yeah.

Spencer (02:57.333)
You know what's funny about your favorite part? If you listen, it's going... With that opening part, was pretty great.

Luciano (02:59.724)
Hmm So in in a way it's the same thing They spent all the animation budget on it that's for sure Yeah, and then the rest they just found they just found some interns like just do the rest

Matt (03:02.497)
It's not wrong.

Spencer (03:11.413)
To that of the music rights every dollar well spent Do the rest we only have enough money for half the frames

Matt (03:21.024)
It's fine.

Just tell AI you want it to sound like this. Maybe I'll get it to... I liked... This is bad because it's such a minor part. I like the idea that Helm turns into a wraith and that's how he's stalking all of the wild men killing them.

Spencer (03:26.761)
Ha ha ha!

Luciano (03:27.084)
Yeah. What's your favorite part,

Luciano (03:44.62)
Yeah, it is a coll- coll- coll- idea. Yeah, that's what I Too bad they didn't go through with it.

Spencer (03:45.461)
But he wasn't a rape.

Matt (03:47.713)
That's why it's not a big part of the movie.

Spencer (03:49.333)
So you liked the thing that didn't happen in the movie.

Matt (03:54.709)
I like the idea of the thing that didn't happen in the movie.

Luciano (03:55.758)
The idea of the Hilt people that he was a wraith.

Spencer (03:58.739)
No, but he was, no, this is like a whole thing. Are we getting, yeah, we're not getting into this now.

Matt (04:01.941)
We'll get into it. We'll get into it. Now we have lots of questions. We're gonna get into all of them. so like it's, it's, I want to say this now as we get into this movie because I know we gave a review at the end, but like we're starting off like we do when we really hate a movie and we don't really hate this movie. This movie just was frustrating.

Luciano (04:17.998)
No, we don't. Yes.

Spencer (04:21.203)
I think I probably hate this movie the least out of all of us.

Matt (04:24.161)
Possible, we'll find out. And so, I mean, let's just... I think the fairest way to talk about any Lord of the Rings movie is to compare it to other Lord of the Rings things. Because, why not? Yeah.

Luciano (04:33.582)
Is that fair?

Spencer (04:35.453)
It's well, you know what that is going to happen in any popular IP, right? Like you.

Luciano (04:39.874)
Yes.

Spencer (04:45.589)
I know, but that's just gonna happen. Like if you watch a new Star Wars movie, you're gonna be like, well, it's not as good as Empire. You watch a new Indiana Jones movie and you're cutting your eyes out. That has nothing to do with anything I'm saying. But no matter what, you watch anything of like, try to get that nostalgic dollar out of you, you're gonna naturally compare.

Luciano (04:45.934)
Ha

Luciano (04:52.362)
Empire. Yeah, yeah.

Matt (04:52.958)
Empire. Yep.

Matt (04:58.465)
It's not as good as Raiders. No.

Matt (05:09.105)
Right, so what we're going to do is not compare it to the movies, like the good movies or even the bad movies, because that would be unfair and done by different, very different people. But I think now that Amazon, I don't care. I'm trying to segue into this question. So let me segue. But I think the fairest thing to do is now that most of the Lord of the Rings stuff sits with Amazon, the Amazon Studios, let's talk about how this compares to Rings of Power.

Spencer (05:14.015)
Well, that would be unfair.

Luciano (05:16.002)
That would be unfair.

Spencer (05:19.997)
No, Peter Jackson was involved with this.

Okay, okay, I'm just... Yes.

Spencer (05:38.579)
well. It does it well.

Luciano (05:41.026)
Hey, hey, hey kids, here's a plate of poop and here's a plate of vomit. Which one smells the worst?

Spencer (05:46.389)
No, come on those both sound like rings of power The bricks of power I will say You know, I've watched it. I the first season I actually legitimately hated the second season. I liked more Than the first season, but I will say this going back to my first point that show Amazingly feels does not feel at all connected to Lord of the Rings. It feels like it's like it

Matt (05:47.071)
Wow. Wow.

Luciano (05:53.326)
You

Luciano (06:05.624)
Same.

Spencer (06:16.681)
different world, you know, and

Luciano (06:17.07)
Yeah, it's such a different take on the same world. I think that's the problem. You know why? You know why? Because I'm not going to get into it too much because I know Matt didn't watch it either. So it's just going to be you and me fucking talking about it. Well, no, I mean, most of the dwarves doing this, like there's some casting choices were unfortunate and and they don't like the like we've seen some of those characters in other movies.

Spencer (06:21.621)
Yeah, it just feels like different

Spencer (06:32.127)
Cause the dwarves... Cause the dwarves don't have beards?

Luciano (06:46.946)
Like Galadriel and Elrond and right. And it's like, no, this is not the same character. I'm sorry. This is shit. At least for me.

Spencer (06:54.003)
I mean, the casting is definitely was an issue with where we're not doing a whole review Rings of Power. All I'll say is after watching Rings of Power, this felt like almost a breath of fresh air where I was like, this feels, and like there was a lot of those cheesy moments of inspiration and stuff where was like, this feels like Lord of the Rings. Like it feels like the like, in our darkest hour, must believe in ourselves.

Matt (07:09.345)
Sure.

Luciano (07:12.396)
Yeah.

Spencer (07:17.427)
and believe in something greater than us. it's just like, yeah. Honestly, I think the music does have a lot to do with it. they don't, I guess they don't have the rights for the music for Amazon because they only own some of the appendices, I think. There's a whole fucking thing. So.

Luciano (07:21.61)
Yeah.

Luciano (07:28.771)
Yeah.

Luciano (07:33.388)
Yeah.

Matt (07:34.977)
Yeah, they don't actually own any of the mainline stories, right? They don't own the three books as an example. They own the other ship.

Luciano (07:38.497)
Yeah.

Spencer (07:38.782)
No.

and they can't even like reference a lot of certain things they can't cover. It's like a whole fucking, it's like a Sony, Sony Spider-Man situation. yeah, so after watching Rings of Power, was like, I'm like, sorry, when this movie started with the music and even a lot, like throughout the movie, was like, okay, this feels like, like it's hitting that feeling a little bit, whereas Rings of Power, it felt like a corporate regurgitation of it with nothing, nothing of the soul coming through.

Luciano (07:41.858)
Yeah.

Matt (07:49.057)
Hmm

Luciano (07:50.37)
Yeah.

Luciano (08:09.334)
Yeah, I will add to that that this movie did something that I like, which is it didn't take a story that is very well known and very well written and shit all over it. Instead, it like kind of created its own story. And it's not the end of the world. And it's not like saving the whole universe is like this just a fight between a single

nation of humans or men as you know and it stays there and it tells the story like it doesn't try to by the way this one guy is the guy who cuts Frodo's hair or whatever like it's not doesn't do anything like that the only real reference yeah it was yeah the only reference we get is you know the naming of Helm's Deep which is I thought it was well learned because it was in the end of the movie and it's an homage to the character right

Matt (08:42.429)
Right. Yeah.

Spencer (08:46.261)
Heh.

Wait, he was the guy who cut Frodo's hair? What?

Matt (08:52.627)
was yeah

Spencer (09:00.83)
Yeah, it was like tasteful.

Matt (09:02.645)
Well, like the Frey Laugh or whatever the hell his name, is the 10th king, but the first king, the second line, etc. So like it just it matches up nicely, but it doesn't like.

Luciano (09:06.274)
Frail off. Yeah.

Luciano (09:11.106)
Yeah.

Spencer (09:14.751)
Wait, wait, who is Fraylof? Is he Lord of the Rings?

Luciano (09:18.818)
Yeah, well in the story, yes. He's the first king in the second line of Kings of Rohan. Like in the stories themselves.

Spencer (09:26.431)
Okay.

Matt (09:26.697)
Yeah, but he doesn't show up in the movies or anything. No.

Spencer (09:28.893)
You never see him in Lord of the Rings or anything, because this is quite a bit before.

Luciano (09:30.954)
No, Yeah. But they take just like little threads to tie it in with the main story, but they don't wallow in it. It's like not the whole big thing.

Spencer (09:41.641)
Yeah, it cool. It was cool like how the orcs were just stealing people's rings. And it wasn't like followed up on it's just like that's what like, cool. Like he's been kind of going at this a long time just trying to find that fucking ring, you know.

Luciano (09:45.335)
Yeah.

Luciano (09:53.77)
I thought it was when it was like, huh, so Sauron didn't know how rings work? Is that why they were stealing rings? Take me the rings. I want to see what they look like. Like that was weird to me. I guess.

Spencer (10:04.437)
He's trying to find his ring. I just like the idea of like they bring them all back and Sauron's going through one at a time. Like, nope. Nope. Next.

Matt (10:08.15)
Yeah.

Luciano (10:12.0)
Nope. Yeah.

Matt (10:14.881)
But like, it's not like, and they show us the goblins, it's not like they're smart in this world. So it's like, gotta give them simple instructions, right? Just get all the rings. Or I guess they're orcs, yeah, that's right, sorry. But they act like goblins and they're goblin shaped. The one is goblin shaped,

Luciano (10:25.656)
Goblins? Arcs?

Spencer (10:25.898)
Mm.

Luciano (10:29.454)
They act like goblins, I will give you that.

Yeah, that's true. Yeah. We try not to mention it too much.

Spencer (10:35.079)
Yeah. Hell, I'm goblin shaped.

Matt (10:42.047)
Is that because of the Harry Potter thing or like what's happening right now?

Spencer (10:43.733)
I look like

Luciano (10:45.582)
Oh wow! I see how it is. Wow! I know. Off the light.

Spencer (10:49.661)
Whoa, whoa, crossed the line, took me a second.

Matt (10:53.825)
You

Spencer (10:55.669)
Just cause I have gold doesn't make me a goblin

Matt (10:57.857)
Well that's a different question so we can steer clear of that. There's no good way to start this question into this movie so let's just start here. Helm, the king of Rohan. He is pierced with many arrows and survives unlike his son. And he wakes up from a coma and he basically disappears. I want to know what

Luciano (10:58.796)
Hahaha!

Luciano (11:05.774)
Hahaha.

Luciano (11:21.294)
Mm-hmm.

Matt (11:28.107)
What happened to him when he disappeared in between him showing back up and murdering that Ullger?

Luciano (11:36.212)
He fucking hit the gym as good as it does.

Spencer (11:38.005)
I was gonna say, there's only really one option. Joe Rogan appeared with a syringe of HGH combined with bowl meat and he said, you hit this and you fucking hit some of these.

Matt (11:38.177)
Ha ha ha ha

Matt (11:44.833)
Ha ha ha ha.

Luciano (11:48.192)
Yeah. Yeah, no. Yeah. It was just like like a set like a set of syringes with a G Asian and like five pounds of It's like this is going to be you now. Yeah.

Spencer (11:59.697)
Yeah, elk meat, pure elk meat. He's like the joke of the liver king. All natural. This is an all natural diet.

Luciano (12:09.324)
Well, I mean, but by the same token, he does kill Freckle with a single punch, making One Punch Man proud.

Spencer (12:19.231)
Well, that's what I was wondering and I wanted to get into that. Obviously he got yoked in between getting shot, but was he always sup he was yoked, but was he superhuman or did he become superhuman or was that just him?

Matt (12:19.361)
Yes

Luciano (12:28.79)
Yeah.

Already?

Matt (12:31.349)
He was pre-yoked. Yeah.

That's... Well, I was gonna say that everyone is surprised that he won One Punch Man's Freqa. So I don't think he was Superman before the Arrow and then the Hanging Out Not Helms Deep, as we're call it, since it's not Helms Deep until Hornburg. Yeah.

Luciano (12:38.691)
Deal.

Luciano (12:46.126)
Well yeah, even he was.

Luciano (12:58.158)
Harnburg. Harnbug. Harnburg? Something like that.

Spencer (13:01.941)
I thought he was my interpretation was he died and came back as a Wraith they kept on the Wraith and he's like ripping people apart with his bare hands and I'm like

Luciano (13:15.022)
So that would have made more sense,

Spencer (13:18.463)
That's what I thought, but then I thought when he saw his daughter he was gonna be like, who are you? He's just gonna be blind. Even his eyes look different. I think they made his eyes look whited out kinda and ghostly. But then he's just like, hey, I should've protected you. What's up? what's up? Hey, it's good to see you.

Matt (13:25.383)
Yeah. Nah.

Luciano (13:28.48)
Yeah. Yeah, they did.

Matt (13:30.517)
But then he just came right back like it was nothing.

hey, Era, you're here!

Luciano (13:38.338)
No, and honestly, that would have been a cool thing to do because he was a king, you know, one of the kings of men and the kings of men, you know, famously turn into rates, ring rates. So it would have been a nice, another nice kind of tie in. this is something that happens to, you know, powerful like whatever. Sure. But like, but it's fine. Cause it made more sense than him being made into a pin cushion. Yeah.

Matt (13:52.747)
precursor.

Spencer (13:57.045)
The daily become ringwraiths because they wear the rings of power.

Matt (14:02.165)
You're building

Spencer (14:04.68)
Yeah, for sure.

Matt (14:05.025)
It doesn't have to be like, if it was mainline the same, that would be annoying. But the idea of like, this concept of race in the human culture had been there. And it happens in these ways.

Luciano (14:13.952)
Yeah, exactly. Yeah.

Spencer (14:16.201)
Yeah, I mean, there's supernatural shit all over. Like, if you look at again, Lord of the Rings, the return of the king, he has the army of ghosts, you know, that they bring back. Yeah. So, and that's what I thought happened. And, but then he just froze and then died.

Luciano (14:24.534)
Yeah. So there's precedent, right? Yeah.

Luciano (14:36.182)
also died frozen died on his feet somehow.

Matt (14:38.881)
So let's ask a couple of questions here. These are some questions to what was he doing because if he was on the Joe, no, I know, but if he was on the Joe Rogan, steroid experience, my question.

Luciano (14:44.654)
We established what he was doing, was getting it righted out.

Spencer (14:51.091)
Hehehehehe

Luciano (14:51.342)
His second less known podcast, the Joe Rogan steroid experience. Yeah.

Matt (14:56.821)
Yeah. It's his first foray. It didn't go well because the first only guy who did it died. But why? Why does he not just go inside the castle?

Spencer (15:00.351)
Mm-hmm

Spencer (15:03.765)
You

Luciano (15:04.606)
You

Luciano (15:13.155)
Yeah.

Spencer (15:15.935)
So again, I thought it was because he was dead already and it was like, he's not going to have a life. He's only got enough rage and ghost power, ghost power to, you know, just kill and that's all he could do. And then he ran out of that. He ran out of juice, both Rogan and ghost wise.

Luciano (15:19.949)
Yeah.

Matt (15:28.577)
Ghost power!

Luciano (15:28.726)
Ghost power!

Matt (15:33.835)
Great. I would have loved that.

Luciano (15:39.31)
His so you're saying his ride rage ran out

Spencer (15:43.697)
Yeah, I think I think he was like, I think he was about to die and he took a shot of of Joe Rogan approved adrenaline infused with fucking fucking bull semen, cocaine. And it was just like he was like on a high. He was on like fucking bender. And it was just like he was felt him coming down. He's like, I'm just going to use this.

Luciano (15:56.238)
Cocaine?

Matt (16:06.689)
That's fine.

Luciano (16:06.862)
He fucking punches a troll's horn out. That's roid rage for you.

Matt (16:10.483)
Yeah. But so then the question I have then, shouldn't he have been more a little bit more mythological? Like not just the roid rage, but like something where like, you know, the orcs try to hit him or the troll tries to hit him and he like, he's like part apparition where like kind of passed through on the edge or something like, put me where he's like, he's not all human.

Luciano (16:32.526)
Like we said, it would have been better if that were the case, but it's clearly not, right? Because like he was in the middle of a blizzard, right? Finding a bunch of people who are armed. He wasn't armed. He had no sleeves, which is no sleeves, just sleeveless.

Spencer (16:37.781)
Pick one, right?

Spencer (16:50.997)
He was top, wasn't he topless?

Matt (16:52.361)
None. No, he had like, like any good gym bro. He ripped his sleeves off.

Spencer (16:55.637)
Sorry, was my imagination. Yeah, he's a sleeveless sweatshirt material. This college sweater. Just doing reps.

Luciano (16:57.934)
Yeah, exactly.

Matt (17:04.467)
Yeah, he's got to keep his core temperature up. You get it.

Luciano (17:04.62)
Yeah, exactly.

Yeah. And and just dodging and punching people. And he gets hit in the back of the leg, I think, or the back or in the back by one of the guys that he tosses like a ragdoll. And it was like I was like, so if he can do that, why not just advance and like one punch every fucking person on that other army?

Matt (17:17.407)
Yeah.

Matt (17:28.501)
I don't know why he stayed at the.

Spencer (17:30.013)
Also, why wasn't he using a weapon?

Luciano (17:33.996)
Yeah, because his hammer hand, Helm Hammerhand, which is a cool name. It's a fucking cool name, but.

Spencer (17:35.861)
did he get that name? It's a great name. Did he get that name from one punching Freck?

Matt (17:41.728)
Yep.

Luciano (17:45.326)
No, it was there it was that before But yeah He He put one punch one punch freckles dead first That's where he got the name and then he just proved it when he punched. Yeah. Yeah exactly I go this again

Matt (17:45.441)
You know what? Let's just say yes. I like it better that way.

Spencer (17:48.117)
that would've been cooler they're like damn he's got a guy that hits fucking like a hammer

Matt (17:57.461)
Yeah.

Spencer (17:59.225)
he just did it again? He just act surprised? Who knew? What? Yeah, yeah. And he just looks at his own fist like he's surprised. Like this whole thing? There I go killing again.

Matt (18:04.513)
Just that one family line just has a really weak chin. Yeah.

Luciano (18:10.19)
Like really, like paper, paper chins basically.

Hahaha!

Matt (18:16.737)
Let's talk a little bit more about Helm's family. We have Hera, his daughter, who is the focal point of this movie. We'll get to her. I want to talk about the other brothers. And specifically, I want to ask if they deserve to die. Because definitely the young one deserves to die riding that old horse into battle.

Luciano (18:25.038)
Okay.

Mm-hmm.

Luciano (18:35.18)
Yes, they did. They did.

Spencer (18:35.433)
Hahaha!

Luciano (18:40.642)
I think the eldest deserves to die more. He killed the fucking mumakill, which was great. And then he's just like, yeah, in the middle of the thing where there's a war going on.

Spencer (18:44.181)
He was a good guy, what are you talking about?

Spencer (18:53.685)
Yeah, you fuck- Did you guys see that? You pulled a Jason Momoa.

Matt (19:02.965)
The thing is, when you're on the Joe Rogan steroid experience, you don't think properly.

Spencer (19:05.557)
You know, you can't think straight. He's hanging around with the family like he showed his, he had his workout regiment.

Luciano (19:06.339)
Yeah.

Matt (19:10.955)
Well yeah, because he was yoked, his dad was yoked, but the third brother was not yoked, so he clearly was not on the steroid experience.

Spencer (19:15.597)
Yeah, yeah, it's like those before and after pictures where they're like, this is suspicious, know, looking at like Christian Bale before and after the Batman role. It's just like, But the brother kills that elephant, pulls a Lego loss. It still only counts as one, takes down one guy, the elephant and all the people aboard.

Luciano (19:16.044)
Yeah.

Luciano (19:21.769)
Hahaha!

Matt (19:31.594)
It's fine.

Matt (19:37.269)
Yep.

Luciano (19:37.462)
Yeah. Yes. Sure.

Matt (19:43.051)
Yep.

Luciano (19:44.226)
and then gets shot in the neck, literally.

Spencer (19:45.169)
Yeah. then he's literally doing like a rock. So the rock celebration. Yeah. And then that was pretty cool. Caught me off guard. do you deserve to die?

Luciano (19:49.354)
Yeah, that's that was missing like air guitar ring. That's shot in the neck.

Mm-hmm.

Spencer (20:05.013)
No. Did he deserve to die though? Yes. I mean, you knew they were gonna... I mean, it's Lord of the Rings movie, so didn't know if they were gonna all die, because it's like big family theme, a lot of the things. I didn't know if they were gonna go down the road of like they need to all work together and become, you know.

Luciano (20:05.504)
I... Yes. I see what you mean.

Matt (20:08.223)
Yes.

Luciano (20:24.778)
No, I think like I was pretty sure everybody I thought even like Helm was going to die in that war because I knew it was going to be Hera. It was going to be Hera versus Wolf. Like that was kind of obvious, but.

Spencer (20:31.145)
No, you knew Helm was gonna die.

Yes. I thought Helm was going to die in the opening scene. I thought they got Brian Cox for one day of shooting or recording.

Matt (20:35.691)
Sure. I would have thought...

Yeah, I thought. I thought Freck over.

Luciano (20:40.474)
I see. Yeah, I thought so too. I was like, he's going outside. so Brian Cox was expensive, She's gonna get shanked in that fight.

Spencer (20:47.952)
Yeah, yeah.

Matt (20:50.891)
Well, I thought Freckle would poison him somehow.

Luciano (20:53.506)
Yeah, me too. Like a green smear. No, it's nothing.

Spencer (20:54.549)
put poison on his chin. Hit me right here! And then he gets killed.

Matt (20:56.245)
Yeah, it's paper should.

Spencer (21:04.405)
But I don't really like the second younger brother. I vaguely remember he was His stupid horse got him killed

Matt (21:10.342)
Haleth. Yeah.

Luciano (21:13.922)
Well, yeah, he was riding an older horse and she couldn't.

Spencer (21:15.829)
Well, that's just being stupid.

Matt (21:18.079)
Yeah, I had to ask. But does stupidity run in the family? And I ask this because Helm, by all accounts, is a smart leader. He has good tactics. He's defended the kingdom numerous times against all sorts of assault. He kind of says that. And then when it comes to Hera and Freylof coming back with all the information, he's like, nah, fuck you, get the fuck out of here, you little wimp.

Luciano (21:34.422)
Right, right.

Luciano (21:41.008)
yeah. Fuck you. No. Yeah. So it's so to me, it's not it's not about being stupid. It's about being a little bitch, baby, like all the hero. Like Freck dies with one punch. Wolf is already sort of like like little whiny beach scorned with with Hera because she gives him this car and the eye. Yes, we will. But like all of this, like

Spencer (21:47.731)
Jazz.

Matt (22:03.273)
Yeah. We know what he is and we're going to ask that question very soon.

Luciano (22:11.15)
Wolf is like, I'm gonna kill you and your mother and your father and your brother and they're all yeah, they're all very like They get offended very easily and that's what happened with Helm Helm was like Freylof was like dude, we have to go back to the ours. No, you're a little bitch, baby Fuck you and disown you and you're ugly. What the fuck? Where did that come from?

Spencer (22:13.749)
They're all, yeah, they're all very entitled.

Matt (22:16.8)
Mm-hmm.

Spencer (22:34.633)
Helms like, you see this fist? It's a pretty big fist. Want a little bit of Jack Johnson?

Luciano (22:38.641)
He kisses it. You want a little bit of this? You want me to change this lamp for you? But like, I think that's less about being just dumb and I think they get very sort of like crossed or like feel scorn very easily at the drop of a hat.

Spencer (22:47.743)
Spencer (23:02.153)
I will say that scene with Helm telling, what was the name, Freyleth? Freyloth, like telling Freyloth off was very almost out of character and seemed quite forced to get him not, yeah, get him away so he could come back and I was like, like even when it was happening, I was like, they just need him to leave so he can do something later, you know? And I was just, it was a little, because at no point in the rest of the movie is he like,

Luciano (23:06.168)
Freeloft, yeah.

Luciano (23:10.595)
Mm-hmm.

Yeah, yeah. I agree. Safe, safe so he could come back. Yeah. Yeah.

Matt (23:16.928)
Yes.

Spencer (23:31.913)
Like don't listen, you know, shut up and I know what to do. You know, the whole.

Luciano (23:36.023)
Yeah, he was because the only is like I left my daughter and your care and this is what happened I ran away that shut up woman you get out. What the fuck was that? Yeah

Spencer (23:44.221)
Yeah, yeah, yeah, it was good.

Matt (23:45.921)
He rescued me. Let's just, I think we need, at this point we need to talk about Wolf. Because you've referenced everyone seems like a little entitled. And I just have to ask the question, is, is not the right question. How, how did Wolf become the first incel?

Luciano (23:53.355)
off

Spencer (24:09.269)
the first in cell of all time.

Matt (24:13.191)
Yeah, like if they are gonna write, you know a bible they got the bible about jesus and they got the bible about the first incel wolf How?

Luciano (24:21.195)
Right.

Luciano (24:25.024)
Well, I mean, for one thing, probably some influence from Thorne, because Thorne, the first thing that Thorne says in the movie is like, I think they should take the shoot maidens sigil away because they disappear like holy shit, bro. Yeah, exactly. That's what it felt like. Let's make Rohan great again and take this banner out. it's like. I don't know. mean, his father didn't seem like a good guy either.

Matt (24:31.074)
yeah.

Spencer (24:37.525)
look at this woke banner for the women Yeah

Matt (24:40.447)
Yeah

Matt (24:53.608)
Whaaaat?

Spencer (24:54.197)
How dare you sir!

Luciano (24:54.446)
So I think that that has something to do with that.

Matt (24:58.827)
Don't you say one bad word about paper chin.

Luciano (25:01.934)
Paper churned fracas, he's known.

Spencer (25:02.709)
Glass Jofrek. Yeah, would, well he's the first incel because he gets, well he's involuntary, yeah, he's involuntary celibate, that's the fact. But it's not just, know, there are many men who are involuntarily celibate. That does not make you an incel. An incel are those who take that rage

Matt (25:04.468)
Yeah.

Luciano (25:15.682)
He's celibate and doesn't want to be. Yes.

Luciano (25:27.15)
True, true.

Spencer (25:32.981)
from not being wanted by anyone and instead of looking inward, they go outward. It's not me that's a bad catch, it's you for being an entitled, you think you're better than me piece of shit, get to get the whole woke, woke, woke agenda. You can't handle a wolf and he doesn't body that for sure, because he's like,

Luciano (25:33.033)
Ha ha ha!

Luciano (25:37.196)
Well, it's the entitlement, which is...

Matt (25:38.059)
Point fingers, yeah.

Luciano (25:53.55)
It's the entitlement, which, yeah, yeah.

Spencer (26:03.455)
The second she's like, like what? didn't, I don't want to get married. Like, I haven't seen you, what's going on? He's like, how dare you? This is everything to me.

Luciano (26:07.8)
Yeah.

Luciano (26:13.45)
Yeah, yeah, was the energy. The energy is all that is like, would it be so bad? She's like, yeah, I don't want to marry anyone. Not just you. I'm not going to. Yeah, exactly.

Matt (26:13.729)
It's

Spencer (26:22.089)
But I'm a nice guy!

Matt (26:25.333)
The fact that he like took her friendship for like a romantic interest is peak and so.

Spencer (26:29.467)
Yeah, peak Intel.

Luciano (26:30.126)
First of all, of all, cliche as fuck, but yes. I let you cut my eye.

Spencer (26:34.197)
I held the door open for you. You have to have sex with me now.

Matt (26:40.211)
Yeah, I didn't didn't rat you out. Where's my blowy?

Spencer (26:43.029)
and and he rides that energy throughout the entire movie it's just even when he becomes king it's just he's he's like but i'm still i'm still celibate i still can't get laid

Luciano (26:44.15)
Jesus Christ!

Luciano (26:50.614)
It gets worse and worse as it goes.

Luciano (27:00.546)
No, he captures her and immediately he like makes overtures and like also cuts her near the eye just out of spite, really.

Spencer (27:11.111)
It's so perfect, it is so perfectly like a perfect depiction of an insult because it's like when he thinks he has a chance with her he's kinda, he's nice, you know and he's like I think that we could, I knew it, I loved you, we could be together, it be perfect, you know, could be, the second there's any kind of like hesitation it's like fuck you bitch, fuck you!

Luciano (27:21.387)
Yeah.

Luciano (27:26.839)
Yeah, yeah.

Matt (27:29.569)
If if if we got married I kill you bitch

Luciano (27:31.372)
Yeah, yeah.

Spencer (27:35.085)
Yeah, what do mean if? What do mean if? You think you're going down to my level? I'm better than you! I can have any girl I want! Please love me!

Luciano (27:35.212)
Yeah, yeah.

Luciano (27:41.294)
And then she runs away and she's like, oh, I'm going to show her. I'm going to kill her dead. I'm going to kill her brothers. And then when she's crying, I'm going to kill her. And then I'm going to cry.

Spencer (27:51.125)
and I'm gonna write I'm gonna post on Twitter

Luciano (27:53.772)
Yeah, I'll write a manifesto.

Matt (27:55.841)
I'm gonna get on 4chan, I'm gonna go right with manifesto.

Spencer (27:59.981)
Back in a hundred, in the year a hundred, the first year of the wizard, women didn't have these kind of rights.

Luciano (28:07.054)
Yeah, so I think that's how.

Matt (28:11.679)
Okay, I think that answers it. I think we have to ask this question. We're talking about Lord of the Rings. Let me just ask this real quick. Why didn't the Eagles just fly the ring to Moutain?

Spencer (28:22.197)
Because

Luciano (28:22.92)
Yes, why didn't they?

Honestly, this movie fuels that because in this case the eagle did fly the armor to frail elf.

Matt (28:31.571)
Mm-hmm.

Spencer (28:34.739)
Listen, the eagles thought that if they did it, they would be entitled to sex.

Luciano (28:39.79)
The incel eagles.

Spencer (28:41.429)
They may be Intel Eagles. So Gandalf knew that and he didn't want to play those games, you know. He knew what they wanted. Yeah, and it would be an awkward, you know, landing. Coming back, you know.

Luciano (28:49.996)
He knew their predisposition. He knew their predisposition, yeah.

Luciano (28:59.342)
I actually like the Chekov's Eagle that they did here. one of the first comments I made in this movie is when she's riding and she has the fucking gigantic drumstick. I'm like, what the fuck is that? She's going to eat that? no, it's for the eagle. OK.

Matt (28:59.701)
Yes. I was just curious.

They're fine.

Spencer (29:14.409)
Yes!

Spencer (29:18.751)
That was SetupSp-

Matt (29:18.923)
The proportions were all off in that, because even when she held it up and then did they pick her up or did they caught it and they flew by her? I was just like, how big is anything?

Luciano (29:28.192)
Yeah, exactly. Well, that's that's that was that was when I went, with the animation. Yeah. Perspective perspective isn't a thing, right?

Spencer (29:28.757)
The biggest is things.

how big things are

Matt (29:33.258)
What big are things?

Spencer (29:39.345)
And they set that up real early that I forgot about it that even when she was climbing at the end, I was like, she's trying to find like another pathway out of here. And then I was like, yeah, the Eagles, the Intel Eagles.

Matt (29:39.538)
Nah.

Luciano (29:42.06)
They did.

Luciano (29:51.606)
Well, but they, I mean, the eagles show, like they show the eagles flying and she looks up and goes, I have an idea. You didn't, you didn't connect the things.

Spencer (29:58.269)
I thought they were regular sized birds because how big are things? Because they were talking about like sending, you know, they're shooting down all our carrier pigeons or yeah. So it's like, thought she looked at the bird. was like, if I climb up, I can get a message out above everything.

Matt (30:01.377)
Yeah. How big are things? That's a great question.

Luciano (30:03.03)
Yeah, fair enough, fair enough.

Luciano (30:08.684)
Messenger pigeons or whatever. Yeah. Yeah.

Luciano (30:17.944)
No, it was more like, shoot this bitch. That's what you did.

Spencer (30:21.438)
Yeah, yeah, pretty much.

Matt (30:23.411)
I have a slightly different question. Remember the water in the water?

Luciano (30:30.946)
Okay.

Spencer (30:31.325)
Yep, I do.

Matt (30:31.679)
the monster that ate the Mimikil.

Matt (30:37.729)
I want to know why the Watcher wanted to eat the Momma Kill so much versus Hera.

Luciano (30:47.246)
grabbing Hera who's right there for the whole time and and try to try to do it with an arrow

Matt (30:49.579)
It was right there. Yeah.

Yeah.

Spencer (30:54.847)
I mean, I think it's pretty obvious. You're trying to put on muscle mass, you're talking pure protein. Think about it. Think about it. But we're talking per pound, you're getting way more protein out of an elephant. If you haven't eaten elephant, what are you doing?

Luciano (31:02.06)
Hahaha!

Matt (31:03.809)
Wait, the watcher is Joe Rogan?

Luciano (31:07.202)
The Watcher is Joe Rogan. Yeah.

Matt (31:15.637)
That is basically pure protein.

Luciano (31:22.146)
So this is like very on point for John Rubin because if eating an elephant would give you that much power, imagine eating a crazy like an insane elephant like that one was. It would give you even more power.

Spencer (31:36.123)
I I Joe Rogan Tentacle Monster, am actually grinding down that elephant into a new powder that you can buy. And you could smoke it through these, what I like to call protein pipes. And you smoke this powder and you will be so high.

Luciano (31:41.634)
Hahaha!

You can smoke.

Luciano (31:51.778)
Hahaha!

Luciano (31:55.758)
Dead.

Matt (31:59.734)
The Joe Rogan pipe experience is...

Spencer (32:02.421)
The Joe Rogan elephant.

Luciano (32:02.926)
the Joe Rogan Swump experience in this case.

Spencer (32:08.117)
called elephant protein and it's basically crack.

Matt (32:09.953)
Hey speaking, I do want to know a bit more about this element protein. What do you think either Joe Rogan the watcher or just a regular watcher? What do you think the preferred seasoning for a momokil is and or is there a favorite dipping sauce that goes along with it?

Luciano (32:26.444)
Hmm, that's a good question.

Spencer (32:29.951)
I imagine the elephant meat is quite gamey.

Luciano (32:33.464)
Tough. Yeah.

Matt (32:35.713)
I have to, I gotta be this asshole for a second. isn't most meat that isn't chicken gamey?

Luciano (32:42.583)
Well, yes.

Spencer (32:44.181)
Not human. We're moving on! I said we're moving on! I believe that elephant, you want to marinate that for at least a day or two in a barbecue sauce.

Matt (32:44.285)
Okay, no further. He's the one.

Luciano (32:46.648)
How do you know? I don't want to know how you know.

Matt (32:58.355)
Okay. Right.

Okay.

Luciano (33:03.116)
I was gonna say pineapple but okay. Yeah, is it like, yeah.

Spencer (33:05.129)
pineapple juice, like to break it down. But how are you gonna smoke it?

Luciano (33:11.778)
You can slurp it in that case. With, with, with the straw.

Spencer (33:13.525)
I mean how do I get a fit it into my into my protein pipe? Cuz now cuz we got you got a dry dry it out

Luciano (33:21.858)
That's fair. You can't leave it too long.

Matt (33:24.021)
Wait, is every protein pipe one moa kill stuffed down into a small pipe?

Spencer (33:28.981)
Exactly. It's one powder and one smokeable dose.

Luciano (33:29.44)
Yes. You distill that Moomah Kill into its like essence. Yeah.

Matt (33:37.759)
Right, so I don't want it like it's gonna taste gross. So it's like it's peach flavored. Can I get like like peach flavored or like

Spencer (33:43.948)
Even better, it's elephant flavored.

Matt (33:46.977)
Alright, I'm interested. Not Mumakill flavored elephant flavor, just so we're clear.

Spencer (33:47.765)
No, no, we've, we've, we've, we've pureed all the mama kill. I don't even know what you're saying.

Luciano (34:00.076)
Yeah, Mumakill. That's how they call it there. It's an olifont, right? Yeah, yeah. It's the same thing.

Spencer (34:03.037)
Only font yes. Yeah, we don't use mumblekill in our branding so. It's it's off putting.

Matt (34:09.268)
Yeah, obviously.

Luciano (34:09.448)
because it's hard to say. Yeah, olive oil powder is what we sell. I think you asked about favorite dipping sauce.

Matt (34:12.225)
It's true.

Matt (34:20.927)
Yeah.

Matt (34:24.426)
wrench.

Luciano (34:24.576)
I yeah branch with some ketchup I guess mixed in just to be really gross just to be really gross that was the grossest

Matt (34:28.267)
Honey mustard

Matt (34:34.401)
What are you? That's gross. What are you French?

Spencer (34:35.401)
What

Matt (34:40.597)
That's grossest thing. This is like how watching like anybody from Quebec, they put mayonnaise and ketchup and then mix it together into some weird slurry and then dip their fries into it. It's gross. You're all gross. You're all fucked up.

Luciano (34:49.731)
It's so good!

Spencer (34:53.151)
Hey.

Luciano (34:53.518)
I'm not even from Quebec.

Matt (34:55.009)
You're gross. You might as well be at this point.

Spencer (34:56.391)
Yeah, you're being shipped there now. They're on their way.

Luciano (34:59.566)
No.

Sacre bleu!

Spencer (35:03.253)
Suck on it, bleh! I think we've answered your question, man. I think it's pretty clear.

Matt (35:08.189)
No, you did. No, it's fine. I'm just like darting around these questions because I want to keep hearing your toes. When they get to not quite Helm's Deep, for whatever reason, the supplies are low. And I'm okay with that because like whatever, I don't know. No one's looking after this place. And then we meet the keeper of the keep or whatever it is. And then I'm like, yeah, probably yeah, probably yeah. And I'm like, wait.

Luciano (35:09.88)
Yeah.

Luciano (35:29.518)
Yeah, like Baba Yaga is what you're talking about. Okay.

Matt (35:38.473)
Weren't you supposed to be looking- you're the keeper, you're looking after this place, the keeper of the halls. What the fuck were you doing? If not, keeping the supplies stocked.

Spencer (35:43.957)
What have you been keeping?

Luciano (35:44.302)
Yeah.

Spencer (35:49.439)
She's busy, man.

Luciano (35:51.106)
Yeah, she's.

Matt (35:51.28)
Doing what Spencer?

Spencer (35:53.661)
Well, Kegels?

Luciano (35:57.838)
No! Oh no! Oh no!

Matt (35:58.923)
Just in case.

Spencer (35:59.285)
She's older!

Got it. That's important. she also has an addiction.

Luciano (36:11.269)
no. Is it a powder?

Matt (36:12.139)
to.

Spencer (36:13.045)
It may be an elephant flavored powder. I mean, I don't want to get into specifics. No, she, she was keeping everything nice and orderly, you know, you don't want to come into a mess.

Matt (36:27.361)
What things?

Luciano (36:28.686)
I don't think she was keeping anything. I think she was just taking a nap for like 30 years.

Spencer (36:34.121)
Maybe she was a wraith.

Luciano (36:36.174)
Matt (36:37.112)
now we're talking. That's what she knew about race.

Spencer (36:37.695)
Yeah, yeah. And she was the person who died in that wedding dress. no. Yeah.

Matt (36:43.099)
Okay, here we go. So why is she doing the Kegels then? Her husband clearly did.

Luciano (36:44.618)
Nice, now we're cooking.

Spencer (36:49.181)
Well, that's what keeps your spirit alive. It powers her core.

Luciano (36:52.763)
You

Matt (36:56.417)
Okay, fair enough.

Spencer (36:57.663)
So she died on her wedding day of that sickness. she, you know what? I think this might be Laura accurate. This might be Canaan. So she's, cause she's the one who gives her the dress and suspiciously after she gives her the dress and she wears it out, I don't think you see her again.

Luciano (37:14.862)
Are you saying she is the dress? Okay, I'm with you. Oof. Oh no. What have I done?

Spencer (37:17.245)
I wasn't, but I am now.

She just wants to be warned, baby. She just wants to be warned.

Spencer (37:27.509)
Yeah, there there that's why she doesn't have supplies rates don't eat Matt

Luciano (37:31.17)
I think we answered that question.

Matt (37:31.379)
no, well, I'm...

Luciano (37:36.77)
Yeah, also she can't manage any supplies if she's a ghost. She can't carry anything.

Matt (37:37.065)
No, but like...

Spencer (37:41.757)
Yeah, man, what a stupid question.

Matt (37:48.033)
Well, you got me there, fuck.

Spencer (37:49.237)
The ghost bring food?

Matt (37:54.399)
I guess you've defeated my question.

Luciano (37:56.91)
Not answered, just defeated it.

Matt (37:59.233)
Just defeated.

Matt (38:03.969)
Why do they still chance to know from Game of Thrones? Yeah.

Luciano (38:07.178)
Why? That's a good question.

Spencer (38:10.933)
because it's easier than making your own character.

Luciano (38:13.908)
A new character, yeah, yeah.

Matt (38:15.967)
It's because winter was coming and they had to use that too, like.

Spencer (38:19.101)
Yeah, they're like, we better be, we better be, you know, quick because they'd look directly into the camera. Winter is coming.

Luciano (38:28.188)
Hahaha

Matt (38:29.245)
Is this what would have happened if Danny didn't sleep with him?

Luciano (38:35.468)
Yeah, it will be. Yeah.

Spencer (38:36.275)
this was his future. was kind of off putting though how much he sounded so much like him I thought. I actually looked up the voice actor.

Matt (38:37.886)
Okay.

Luciano (38:43.554)
And it felt like in the beginning of the movie, he wasn't as much as like after he becomes the like the leader of the Hill tribe. Like it's just the accent, the way that he like pouted about everything.

Spencer (38:59.175)
Once he became leader of the wildlings, I mean the hill tribe, sorry, whoops. And once he put on his dire wolf, you know, Jack, mean, his name's Wolf, right? Like his, cause Jon Snow had a wolf. Whoops, no, they're all combining. When Jon Snow, yeah, the Red Queen is,

Luciano (39:02.805)
He'll try. I hadn't even made that connection. Holy shit! That's true!

Matt (39:03.537)
Huh?

Matt (39:10.741)
Whoopsie.

Luciano (39:13.794)
Yeah.

Matt (39:15.073)
Mm-hmm.

Luciano (39:21.602)
He was a wolf that fought a ghost?

Luciano (39:27.466)
no, no.

Spencer (39:29.225)
Daenerys he's in love with he's an Intel because he's on the watch and he can have sex It's all It's all too close but yeah, like and he wears that same cape with the like the fur at the top it like his design and he has dark hair and it's like it was It was I feel like the creators

Luciano (39:34.242)
Ha ha!

Matt (39:38.196)
It's all coming together.

Luciano (39:40.919)
Jesus.

Luciano (39:49.514)
Yeah, it's very similar.

Spencer (39:56.659)
when they were casting were just like, I want a Jon Snow type, you know, and then they just like couldn't picture something else once that was in their heads.

Matt (40:05.601)
They just deleted their backspace type. Enter.

Spencer (40:09.429)
I think when they were writing, Jon Snow was a placeholder in their story.

Luciano (40:10.978)
Yeah.

Matt (40:14.143)
Yeah.

Luciano (40:14.624)
And just stay there. Yeah.

Matt (40:18.101)
Maybe they did search and replace with Johnson though. They just replaced it with the same name. Done.

Spencer (40:20.083)
Yeah.

Done and done. And you know what? Good for them.

Luciano (40:28.078)
Hahaha!

Matt (40:28.171)
Good, good for them. No, that's fair. Let's talk about Thorne. For people who didn't watch this movie, Spencer. Thorne is one of the lords of Orhan. Well, the anti-woke one. And he's the one who also pledges his men, he immediately pledges his men to watch whatever flank, eastern, western, didn't pay that much, southeastern, great. And then he,

Spencer (40:37.572)
haha

Luciano (40:37.922)
Hahaha!

Luciano (40:42.72)
Lords of Ruhran. Yeah. The anti-woke one, yeah.

Luciano (40:54.081)
Eastern. Yeah.

Matt (40:57.525)
bitches off and he like attacks the castle and tries to kill Hera I don't know he died like a bitch that's not my question I just wanted to set this all up because what I really want to know about Thorin is if he was a contestant on Survivor how would he do

Spencer (41:11.701)
Of course that's where you're going with this. We all knew it.

Matt (41:14.106)
Obviously. Where else was I going?

Luciano (41:14.222)
It was so obvious. It was so obvious when you started. How would he do in Survivor? Remind me which one Survivor is again. I don't watch this shit.

Spencer (41:25.171)
Okay, survivors the one where the tribe is spoken. They vote on if they're going off the island.

Matt (41:27.297)
They survive. Yeah. You vote them off the island and they live in some like inhospitable place for as long as they can.

Luciano (41:30.478)
okay, okay, okay.

Right, like Rohan. Okay.

Spencer (41:37.813)
I think he would, I actually think he would do pretty well on Survivor because it is game of tactical betrayals and you have to, what's the thing they always say in Survivor when they, I don't think they've ever said that in Survivor. Joe Probst, the host, and as we always say in Survivor, survive! And he just leaves. Famously.

Matt (41:52.757)
Survive!

Luciano (41:55.041)
Hahaha!

Matt (41:55.649)
You

Luciano (42:05.176)
But it's.

Matt (42:05.557)
You're much better, she-o.

Spencer (42:07.765)
Not the tribe has spoken they always say like when they when someone blindsided it's like a big part of the show is being blindsided so it's like he'd be good at blindsiding people, but then he'd get like a a Make a name for themselves being someone who blindsides people that's always happens the guys like I've watched her by for quite a bit

Matt (42:12.001)
The tribe has spoken. that the one?

Luciano (42:33.854)
I can tell.

Spencer (42:34.901)
Like there's always like that, somebody who's like, we'll, we'll switch and be like, kind of conniving. But then everyone's like, Oh, you can't trust that guy. He gets a reputation. And then they eventually, a lot of time, those people will make it pretty far, like top three, but at the end in the finale, all the people who have been voted off throughout the entire show get to vote. Yeah. And then they get to vote for the people who they want to win the million. So it's like, you have to win, but, not be a complete dick.

Matt (42:55.246)
chop them down.

Spencer (43:03.903)
Can't think you've earned it?

Luciano (43:05.102)
But don't you have to do like challenges and shit like in Big Brother or whatever?

Matt (43:05.845)
And darn.

Spencer (43:09.371)
Yeah, there's like physical challenges, but that just gets you immunity. The immunity idol. So that'll keep you one week if you win it or if you find it. Because you'll also find it throughout the island. They're hidden as well. So he'd be good at that because he's like an outdoorsman.

Luciano (43:14.584)
I see.

Matt (43:22.847)
What if, Spencer, what if, what if Survivor was filled with the different people from Lord of the Rings? So instead of it being like, you know, a bunch of different like actual humans, it's like all the people from Lord of the Rings. You know, let's just take this movie, just to keep it simple for the listeners.

Spencer (43:38.153)
This movie are all Lord of the Rings.

So you got the W brothers, got the, you got Hera, got Helm. Freck, Freck is going day one.

Luciano (43:49.614)
So yeah, was gonna say Freckle would just die in the first day.

Spencer (43:52.115)
No, Freck is gonna be that guy, cause it's always that one guy who has to leave for like medical reasons. He doesn't get voted off, but he's always like, he's like, I think I ate something, lid. They're like, okay, they call the helicopter in and then it's like, they'll kind of like all these shots of the helicopter and it's always like this big drama. And they act like they died. Freck actually, of course.

Luciano (43:57.166)
Yeah, that's fair. That's fair.

Matt (43:57.703)
Hahaha

Luciano (44:09.292)
Yeah, no, that would be Frecka. That would be Frecka, yeah. Only he would have actually died. Yeah.

Matt (44:16.065)
They're carrying him to the helicopter and they hit his chin on the side of helicopter and he dies

Spencer (44:21.045)
He's got So yeah, he'd go I think I think the final three I think Thor Thorne would make it to the final three and I think I do think Harold would win because People would like her and that that's always comes down to at the end

Luciano (44:21.229)
Yeah.

Matt (44:40.033)
So like I could see it being Thor and Hera and then what was that other, Olwen? I feel like Olwen would just kind of skate through because she's like, no, that's her right-hand woman.

Luciano (44:40.237)
Right.

Luciano (44:47.003)
yeah, that's my favorite character of this movie. The shield maiden.

Spencer (44:49.789)
Is that his right hand man?

yeah, the Shumay would have been good because she's physically good. She would win some challenges and would be like, well, I also though I do think that Wolf's general would do well because he was good at like staying behind the scenes as well, like, pushing, prompting up other people to sort of be the focus. He just propped up the wrong guy.

Matt (44:57.622)
Yeah.

Luciano (45:17.342)
Yeah, guys.

Matt (45:19.115)
So once Wolf gets kicked out then the next week Targ goes.

Spencer (45:22.291)
Yeah, I think that that's probably they make an alliance and then know what wolf would probably betray him right and vote him off to make sure he goes for he'd be like

Matt (45:25.441)
Mm-hmm.

Luciano (45:30.048)
Yes, definitely.

Matt (45:34.197)
And then he'd tell everybody I betrayed my most trusted loyal thing and they'd ship him off the next week.

Spencer (45:39.293)
Yeah, I betrayed him because I wanted to be with you guys. I never trusted him. He was always he's always telling me to do the wrong thing and then they're like, yeah, okay fucking loser Yeah, so yeah

Matt (45:42.589)
Yeah.

Luciano (45:43.576)
Yeah.

And then everybody goes, you betrayed the guy that trusted you the most. Bye.

Matt (45:50.945)
He kept telling me that no woman would ever love me and I was like, no, that's not true. Hera loves me. It'll be fine.

Spencer (45:53.365)
The everyone's like, so yeah, and then I think Harold would win.

Matt (46:00.993)
Yeah, yeah

Luciano (46:08.376)
So Thorne will do well, I think is the answer, but not win. Okay. Who'd be the third? Hera, Thorne, and who? it should be Maiden, okay.

Matt (46:08.64)
teams.

Spencer (46:10.269)
Yes, top three.

Matt (46:12.491)
Top three. Well, that's pretty good.

Spencer (46:15.669)
The Shieldmaiden.

Matt (46:17.225)
Yeah, they'd work together and then everybody would be happy. She'd be happy to hear it.

Spencer (46:21.759)
Helm would do good, but he just draws too much attention.

Luciano (46:22.125)
Yeah.

Matt (46:25.185)
He can vote off quick because he's too powerful. He's too scary.

Luciano (46:25.462)
Right. I think you would just show up. You just show up frozen one morning.

Spencer (46:27.785)
He's too intimidating.

Well, no, mean, obviously, but a lot of time in the show, it's like one guy is really good at the challenges and they're like, he'll just keep winning these immunity idol every week and he'll just go all the way to the end. And they're like, so we got to get him off whenever he doesn't win the immunity idol. We got to all get them off. Listen, all of us have to work together to get him off tonight.

Matt (46:41.353)
Immunity, yeah. Yeah, we're put a stop to him. Sorry, we gotta get him off. Someone just gives him a budget. He gets hand-gibbered so much they turn into a block of ice.

Luciano (46:52.238)
He gets, yeah, gets Hengibert so hard he freezes. That's what happens.

Matt (46:55.497)
Okay. Yeah, that's what I thought. Great. Moving on. We're going to use this perfect segue to ask a different question. If Helm had a dating profile, no mom around, no queen, what would his bio say? How would he attract the next queen of Rohan? Yeah, like for the kids, his son and daughter.

Spencer (47:01.461)
Which is what happens.

Luciano (47:13.111)
Right.

Luciano (47:17.098)
I get, get, yeah, for the kids.

Spencer (47:17.779)
Did you say no mom around?

like his mom. His mom's letting him go on dating profiles.

Matt (47:26.113)
Did we watch Othello? Is that what happened?

Luciano (47:26.266)
Yeah, he didn't have his mom to date so he needed to go on Tinder.

Hahaha!

Matt (47:38.93)
She's chaperoning all the dates though.

Spencer (47:40.245)
Yeah, okay, so what the question was

Luciano (47:41.07)
no. What would his date, what would his dating profile say? I get frozen stiff very fast.

Matt (47:46.857)
Yeah, how is he enticing in potential? Okay.

Spencer (47:51.637)
You're there. It was gonna hit one of these times. Just you just keep going at it

Luciano (47:54.926)
Yeah, I know.

Matt (47:56.993)
It's gonna come back around, be great.

Luciano (47:58.862)
Yeah, I will keep going at it. That's what he said. That's what it says on his profile too. I'll keep going at it.

Matt (48:07.453)
I hope you let someone else go.

Spencer (48:08.565)
I think it would be like, you know, outdoorsy.

Luciano (48:10.222)
Okay. No, I have another idea. I'll go. Go, go, go, go,

Spencer (48:19.039)
big Rogan fan, which is going to make it tough realistically.

Luciano (48:21.39)
Well, it depends on which dating app he's in.

Matt (48:23.412)
Yeah.

Spencer (48:27.443)
Which one's the right wing Christian one? That one that he's good. if it's he'd say, you know, big Rogan fan, all natural, you know, all natural gains, pure muscle mass. Six foot two.

Luciano (48:29.914)
Exactly.

Matt (48:31.231)
That one. Yeah.

Luciano (48:33.645)
Yeah.

Luciano (48:43.982)
Hashtag liver challenge.

Spencer (48:49.939)
like 230 cut and you have a topless photo in his his in his profile. No fat chicks. No fatties. You know, must be in no fatties, no huggos must be into healthy lifestyle, active lifestyle, looking for someone to

Luciano (48:54.284)
Cut, cut.

Matt (49:01.473)
No fatties.

Luciano (49:01.774)
No fair is no uglies.

Matt (49:06.049)
No, I'll go. Yeah.

Spencer (49:19.071)
have strong children with, strong heirs.

Matt (49:23.317)
Well, I'm assuming he's just doing it now today after he's got his kids. Yeah.

Spencer (49:26.799)
so he has-

need new air did I say no other ghosts I think that's pretty good I think that sort of sums up his interests

Luciano (49:32.012)
NNNHAHAHA!

Matt (49:32.765)
You

Luciano (49:39.18)
Yeah, that would definitely be the first thing.

Matt (49:46.068)
You

Matt (49:53.409)
Yeah, as long as he's the king, he'd have a picture of him on the throne. That's where he's like cut, right? Crown on, tophilus, on the throne, fucking, yeah, kissing the bicep, yeah. No.

Spencer (49:56.798)
Yeah.

Luciano (49:57.007)
With the crown for sure. 100%. Yeah. Topless. Yeah. Kissing his bicep. Yeah.

Spencer (49:59.71)
No shirt.

Spencer (50:03.754)
Yeah, no, no subtlety. He doesn't strike me as subtlety. Can kill with one punch.

Luciano (50:08.258)
No.

Matt (50:11.039)
Hahaha

Luciano (50:11.606)
Yeah, was gonna say, have killed with one punch.

Spencer (50:15.861)
And I think he's open to elves and dwarves. I don't think he's...

Luciano (50:22.84)
Dwarves? I don't think he wants dwarves.

Spencer (50:25.193)
Why not? What are you saying? What do mean you people? okay, okay. Okay, then we got it. Yeah, no, no Gondorians elves. Okay.

Luciano (50:27.146)
Is there their their Uggles? Wait, Yeah, we're not talking about goblins here.

Matt (50:32.609)
We're not talking about goblins.

Luciano (50:40.589)
And no Gondorians also.

Matt (50:40.723)
A great, wow, yeah. No, no, all goes, no fatties, no gondorians. Yeah, else okay.

Luciano (50:45.526)
No, no Gondor is elves, okay? Yeah, yeah.

Spencer (50:51.977)
He's open to it.

Luciano (50:53.422)
Yeah, it's like I don't want it, but if you're hot, then that's fine.

Spencer (50:55.677)
I mean, I think he's, I think realistically in his mind, he's like, I'll, I'll like cook up with an elf, but it's not like long-term.

Matt (51:01.217)
Yeah. And like under what under 24, 24 and under. Yeah.

Luciano (51:02.84)
Right.

Spencer (51:06.773)
age well elves elves elves are like oh god what else elves look the same if they're like a thousand so maybe it's like human 24 elves 250 to 300

Luciano (51:08.632)
This is the middle ages, I think it's lower than that.

Matt (51:11.745)
That's it.

Luciano (51:16.29)
That's true.

Matt (51:16.415)
That's fair.

I don't think he would differentiate. would just be like, yeah, he doesn't know enough about Elvis to give a shit. He'd just be like, you know, no one over 25. Yeah.

Luciano (51:22.965)
He wouldn't know. He wouldn't know about it.

Yeah, it's true. No, no, all girls, no all these. Yes.

Spencer (51:31.861)
No, very superficial.

Matt (51:35.521)
Yeah, obviously. All right. I think we've nailed this one next question, please. Thank you We're gonna talk about targ my man targ he's just a general in the Where are they from Dundall in? Dundall in West March, let's just maybe think of Diablo. I couldn't I couldn't on Diablo that all right, so he's from West March. He is the general of West March He goes through some shit his boss

Luciano (51:41.014)
Hahaha!

Luciano (51:50.606)
west march

Yeah.

Luciano (52:05.25)
He does.

Matt (52:05.267)
One Punch Dead, his new boss. The worst.

Spencer (52:09.087)
The worst.

Luciano (52:10.767)
Imagine his resume. Once watched my boss get killed with one punch.

Matt (52:15.315)
Yeah.

Spencer (52:16.435)
I would love like a version of this movie where it's like the office. It's like a workplace comedy. And it's just like, like his boss gets punched in the face dead and it cuts to him like looking into the camera, like, like Jim.

Luciano (52:22.136)
Hahaha!

Matt (52:22.399)
Yeah.

Matt (52:26.446)
Like ya, man.

Luciano (52:27.65)
Yeah, and not having any things to say is like...

Spencer (52:30.517)
Yeah. Uh, and then it cuts to like the one-on-one interviews in the side. He's like, I just don't understand why he went against the guy with hammer hands in a fist fight. That's just, it's just bad planning. Yeah. And then when, and then when his, when his other boss becomes thing and he's like, there's that, the scenes where he's like, take the win. There's nothing to gain here. Let's just go. And he's like, I'll get my revenge. And he's just like, and then it hard cuts to him one-on-one being like this guy.

Luciano (52:38.318)
Yeah, especially when you know you have a glass chin like what is wrong with you?

Matt (52:38.819)
You

Luciano (52:52.141)
Hahaha

Luciano (52:57.838)
Yeah.

Spencer (53:00.423)
And it's like Brian from, you know, the sales rep. He's just like, I can't believe this guy. He's going to get us all killed.

I'd watch that comedy.

Luciano (53:11.69)
Yes, I will.

Matt (53:11.851)
Great, I have a different question that's definitely not like this at all, so I'm gonna ask it. Our boy Tarik needs some therapy. How does that go? What does he talk about? What's on his mind when he has therapy?

Luciano (53:20.967)
Boy, boy howdy.

Spencer (53:27.477)
I definitely think he has like a little bit of like, know, I don't know what the term is. It's not like a imposter syndrome, but it's like, you know, it's like he's, he's like to reference Star Trek, the next generation. He's a little bit of a Barkley vibe where it's like, you know, he's just like, I just don't know why people, don't, I don't feel seen. You know, people don't listen. They don't hear my, my, you know, I, and then the therapist is like next time.

Luciano (53:50.99)
I see. I see.

Spencer (53:57.351)
You're talking to Wolf. You stand up and you say what you think and you make sure he hears you. And then he does it and then Wolf's like, and then, yeah, then he gets stabbed. But it was good for him, you know, I'm proud.

Matt (54:04.831)
Unless you get stabbed.

Luciano (54:05.356)
And he dies. Yeah.

Yeah.

Matt (54:12.607)
Yeah, real growth.

Luciano (54:13.314)
Yeah, and then one moment he felt alive, he felt seen.

Spencer (54:16.467)
He felt he felt seen.

Matt (54:20.042)
Okay, anything else?

Luciano (54:20.608)
I think he also talked a lot about when Freck died. I think he had a little bit of like an imposter syndrome to his like, I'm the general. just watched the king or like the Lord get punched with one, like killed with one punch. And then almost like immediately my next boss almost got killed. Am I good? Should I have done something? Should I have interfered? And I think the therapist would have said, yes, you should have interfered.

and then he would have killed the therapist.

Matt (54:52.667)
I think the therapist of that case was Joe Rogan. And Joe Rogan was like, nah, bro, it's fine. Just hit this. You'll be good.

Luciano (54:55.598)
that would have been a very that would have been a very different vibe Yeah, no, don't worry about it. It's not you. It's them. Just smoke this

Spencer (55:06.005)
You need more protein. If you ever see that video of the monkey just ravishing a fucking deer those things are so strong.

Matt (55:06.388)
You need more protein bro, if you have more protein in you.

Luciano (55:19.31)
Okay. Yeah. Yeah. Joe Joe, the Joe Rogan therapy experience.

Spencer (55:20.155)
It's good therapist

Matt (55:20.337)
Basically, General Targ on the Joe Rogan experience. So General Targ, tell me how you felt when Freke dropped dead. Shocked. Okay. Yeah.

Spencer (55:24.135)
Yeah

Spencer (55:30.857)
Shocked?

A little happy. Guilt. Guilty. You don't know Freckle like I know Freckle.

Matt (55:36.747)
little sad, maybe. Yeah.

Matt (55:43.339)
Okay. You want to, cause I'm thinking like maybe, maybe it's, it's, it's the woke pushing, pushing on Freqa.

Luciano (55:45.399)
Elaborate.

Spencer (55:56.159)
You know what? These left wing, these liberal nut, these libtard nut jobs, do you know that in Rohan, they're taking babies and making them wear the opposite genders clothes?

Matt (56:19.169)
That makes sense to me because I also heard that in Rohan, they don't have enough water to put up fires.

Luciano (56:24.724)
no, no, this is topical now.

Spencer (56:25.469)
Well, no, in Rohan, they do have water and trucks, but they're not letting the trucks in because they're not vaccinated.

Matt (56:35.125)
That's true, I did hear that.

Luciano (56:36.138)
and they have to do emissions checks before they get, yeah.

Spencer (56:37.749)
They have to do missions checks on all the tr-

Matt (56:39.741)
It's because the king's daughter is in charge of fire prevention.

Spencer (56:45.813)
Can you imagine and don't you didn't hear from me, but the, think the daughter might be on the batting for the other team. If you catch my drift and they're put in there, they let her wear pants.

Matt (56:53.427)
Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm.

Luciano (56:55.072)
They let her wear pants. They let her ride horses.

Spencer (57:00.437)
And they put her in charge of the water distribution. And frankly, that makes me feel bad about me. I mean, it's woke. It's what I meant to say. I was just asking questions. And you know, the mayor, there is a D.E.I. of Rohan.

Matt (57:00.713)
Hmm

Matt (57:11.457)
We're not saying there's anything wrong with that.

Luciano (57:12.142)
That got too real there.

Matt (57:18.133)
We're just asking questions, that's all. Yeah. All right.

Spencer (57:29.173)
Okay.

Matt (57:29.616)
And scene. I think we are. Listen, I need you to come off the Drogon experience because the next question... The next question is, I want to know what Hera and Alwyn get up to after they leave. they're not... She can't... Clearly she can't be a queen.

Luciano (57:31.032)
Jesus Christ.

Spencer (57:33.718)
Are we the number one podcast in the world yet?

Spencer (57:41.301)
I refuse.

Luciano (57:43.971)
I refuse.

Spencer (57:45.845)
you

Matt (57:58.133)
because of narrative reasons and definitely not listen.

Luciano (58:01.483)
Because of that's not how the story goes. Yeah

Spencer (58:03.753)
Were they a couple?

Luciano (58:06.59)
we said get away from the Joe Rogan experience thing.

Spencer (58:11.701)
I'm just asking, I just want to look into it, that's all.

Matt (58:12.097)
Spencer? Spencer, I believe two women can be friends without being a couple. I'm not sure.

Spencer (58:17.735)
I just think it's a little suspicious and maybe they should be on a list.

Luciano (58:22.113)
Hahaha!

Spencer (58:24.339)
I actually got that vibe at one point when she kissed her.

Matt (58:28.693)
When? What? What movie did watch?

Luciano (58:28.77)
No, no, but it's not like that

Spencer (58:29.363)
Yes, she did. Yeah, I know. It wasn't like on the lips or anything. for a second I was like, is that romantic? Because I was like, maybe that's the point why she doesn't want to marry anybody.

Luciano (58:36.716)
No.

Matt (58:41.269)
Hey, I know we're joking about incels and the right, but you know people can kiss other people and like, but do you?

Spencer (58:45.218)
No, I know that, but I actually... But like, when you put your lips on someone else, that means you want to be inside them.

Luciano (58:48.526)
Hahaha!

Matt (58:54.529)
Well, you do have me there.

Luciano (58:54.969)
HAHAHAHA

Spencer (58:57.781)
So that's that

Luciano (59:00.533)
Jesus Christ.

Matt (59:04.257)
Is that why you keep kissing me?

Spencer (59:05.333)
Yes! God damn it! Read the room! I'm licking my microphone right now!

Luciano (59:06.19)
Ha ha ha!

Matt (59:08.841)
I should take the hint, I'm sorry.

Luciano (59:12.878)
So, what do they get to? After? Yeah, okay. I can't, like, I can't now.

Matt (59:18.465)
Okay

Spencer (59:25.429)
Just just if I like my microphone and Matt licks his microphone, are we technically making out? That's what I just want to know I think we should try it

Matt (59:25.696)
It's so hard, right?

Let's ask a completely different question. Cleanse the palette.

Spencer (59:37.169)
Why, Matt? Answer me! No, okay.

Luciano (59:39.33)
You

Matt (59:43.361)
Spencer, I just want to be frank, I'm sorry.

Spencer (59:44.763)
Okay. It's fine, we can be friends. We can be friends! I'd like you to meet my sword! My other friend!

Luciano (59:46.152)
no, be careful, be careful. Yeah, he's gonna go to war.

Matt (59:46.913)
Please don't scare my family into a tower.

Luciano (59:54.921)
Hahaha!

Matt (59:55.105)
Please don't make me and my whole family run to a tower and kill my dad and my two sisters. Or guess my mom and my two sisters? I don't know how that works exactly, but... New question! How do weather work in Middle Earth?

Spencer (01:00:06.837)
I'll kill them all is what you're saying.

Luciano (01:00:14.254)
That's a good question. I think if you really want it enough, the code is just a minor inconvenience, at least for the hammerhead household.

Matt (01:00:15.659)
Cause like, it's cold.

Spencer (01:00:23.615)
cold state of mind.

Matt (01:00:26.729)
Mm-hmm. Yeah, they don't they don't seem to give a shit

Luciano (01:00:29.026)
Yeah.

Spencer (01:00:30.835)
You're saying this, can you give me an example of the weather, of the Middle Earth weather?

Matt (01:00:35.209)
of what, when they don't give a shit?

Well, there's either Sunny or Blizzard is what I know so far. So Blizzard, how do Blizzard work? And the Sunny, think I understand everyone's fine. But Blizzard looks different, but functions the same as Sunny.

Luciano (01:00:43.166)
Hahaha!

Spencer (01:00:55.221)
I see. But what about the guy who got frozen?

Luciano (01:00:55.278)
It's just flake, it's just flakes of sun. That's what the snow is.

Matt (01:01:01.921)
Fair point. I don't know how anybody freezes but is encased in ice. Standing up. Smiling.

Luciano (01:01:11.766)
and standing up and smiling.

Spencer (01:01:14.357)
Clearly you've never seen The Shining.

Matt (01:01:17.365)
Well, but he has like a little bit of ice on him. This guy was like, Solo encased in carbonite covered.

Stand-

Spencer (01:01:26.197)
So based on him being frozen, we can determine the blizzard equal cold.

Luciano (01:01:28.192)
F, F.

Luciano (01:01:33.206)
Yeah, but, only after a very long while, cause he was, you know, fighting trolls and orcs and, and heal people, you know, while like sleeveless for a while.

Matt (01:01:41.376)
Wild men.

Spencer (01:01:45.929)
Maybe the cold only affects ghosts.

Luciano (01:01:49.966)
Hahaha

Matt (01:01:51.211)
So once they killed him and he reverted to ghost form, then he froze. I love it.

Luciano (01:01:55.298)
Then he got frozen. Okay. Okay. I like how you said it and you were like, what did I say? yeah, yeah, yeah, that's it.

Spencer (01:01:58.289)
Yeah, like the first time when he got shot with arrows.

Spencer (01:02:04.437)
Yeah, did I say it? If that's what I said, then I agree.

Matt (01:02:05.249)
Yeah, that's what I meant the time.

Matt (01:02:12.558)
at the whole time. Yeah, I guess that was.

Luciano (01:02:15.672)
So I think it works exactly the same only if you're a ghost, otherwise it's sunny and Blizzard same for people.

Spencer (01:02:23.221)
She does wear that dress at the end. even though we've determined that the dress is a ghost.

Luciano (01:02:25.075)
Yes. Just fine. Not new-

Maybe that's why so the the body warmth of the keeper kept her warm

Spencer (01:02:34.677)
No, the blizzard doesn't work? No, because blizzards work on ghosts. We've determined that.

Luciano (01:02:41.204)
But not when they're touching the body of humans.

Spencer (01:02:44.314)
like, like, like, physics, transfusions, science, neurokinetics.

Luciano (01:02:46.414)
Relax. Yeah, exactly. Words? Yeah.

Matt (01:02:54.389)
Those are mostly words. I'm not sure what the last one. Sure. That's that. Listen, there's no higher authority than the matrix. Let's talk about Helm a more. We haven't talked about him enough. Helm. The guy who one punches people.

Spencer (01:02:55.637)
I only know that word from the Matrix when mouse says his neurokinetics are way above normal.

Spencer (01:03:11.687)
About... yes.

Luciano (01:03:13.037)
Helm.

Spencer (01:03:17.941)
Best part of the movie.

Luciano (01:03:19.362)
How, what was his training?

Matt (01:03:22.579)
I asked that and you guys refused to answer it. So we're moving on from that.

Luciano (01:03:25.164)
We did! His training was steroids. We didn't refuse to answer.

Matt (01:03:28.127)
Yeah. Well, I'm a different question.

Since the WWE is on Netflix, need a new draw. What do you think Helm's, like, his persona is gonna be and what's his signature wrestling move?

Spencer (01:03:49.617)
I I don't think needs a persona. He has a persona. He is Helm's hammer hands. And he's like dressed and everything like he lives in Lord of the Rings, which would actually be kind of cool.

Luciano (01:03:50.798)
Yeah, he is the persona.

Spencer (01:04:09.803)
You gotta think that his move has to be hammer related.

Luciano (01:04:13.346)
Well, hammer punch. We've seen it.

Spencer (01:04:16.565)
I don't watch WWE. Could he hit a man in the head with a hammer?

Matt (01:04:16.885)
Yeah.

Matt (01:04:23.265)
Yes, but not like if you use like a like a hammer, you use the hammer and nails maybe, but that's not really effective towards the name of Helm Hammer Hands. Yeah, so he has to use like a big old like Viking sledgehammer and then you probably shouldn't be hitting too many people to have with it.

Luciano (01:04:27.298)
Really.

Spencer (01:04:37.126)
the

like a fledgham.

Luciano (01:04:46.274)
But then, but then, but then he's not hammer hand, he's just hammer.

Spencer (01:04:52.051)
Not if you wore like boxing gloves that were hammers.

Luciano (01:04:54.232)
Like a glove? now we're talking.

Spencer (01:04:59.477)
And they, you know, no, yeah, it's just the head of a hammer over his fist. And. How do you describe that to an audience on audio? Yeah, yeah, he just kind of extends his arms from his shoulder forward. And he's yeah, that's his movies.

Matt (01:04:59.827)
on both hands so you can't grapple. It's just always, it's just always fudging.

Luciano (01:05:02.422)
Yeah, yeah.

Matt (01:05:08.994)
It's like this.

Luciano (01:05:10.478)
What's the name of that rope like?

Matt (01:05:18.734)
He's like a rockin' sockin' robot almost.

Luciano (01:05:19.554)
Yeah. Rock them, them. Yes. Yes. Rock them.

Matt (01:05:23.371)
Yeah

Spencer (01:05:28.901)
And he just walks forward. It's kind of like in The Simpsons where it's like, I'm just going to do this. And if you get in my way, it's your fault. And it's called.

Matt (01:05:34.785)
It's your own fault.

Luciano (01:05:36.585)
Hahaha!

The rock them sock them. Why not?

Spencer (01:05:41.361)
No, it's gonna be something hammer like come on

Matt (01:05:46.273)
Great, love it, hate it.

Luciano (01:05:46.797)
Hammer time.

Spencer (01:05:49.301)
I think that would work. And the song plays every time. An empty hammer, it's like in his corner doing parachute pants dance.

Luciano (01:05:54.157)
Of course.

Matt (01:05:55.297)
Yep, that's perfect. But only the instrumental version of...

Luciano (01:06:01.472)
Yeah

Spencer (01:06:03.797)
Of course. Wait, there's a distribution?

Luciano (01:06:08.054)
Wait, MC Hammer is on this card during the instrumental version.

Matt (01:06:09.057)
You

Spencer (01:06:12.841)
Yeah

Luciano (01:06:16.462)
Perfect, You will do it, I'm sure.

Spencer (01:06:19.957)
I just picture him, this image is just awesome, I wish everyone could see what I'm picturing. Just him doing that punch move from his shoulder forward, walking forward slowly while MCAVERY's holding his parachute pants out to the side, doing that sideways dance behind him, shifting from side to side, yeah.

Luciano (01:06:34.286)
Yeah. Stop. time.

Matt (01:06:35.969)
Just back and forth.

Spencer (01:06:41.033)
Perfect.

Luciano (01:06:42.19)
Yeah, I think we nailed it.

Matt (01:06:42.913)
Um, next question. What does Hera do after she leaves us all at the end of the movie? Cause she can't be the queen. So what does she get up to?

Luciano (01:06:57.166)
you

Spencer (01:06:57.781)
What is she like? She doesn't want to be queen.

Luciano (01:07:01.218)
Right. She doesn't, she doesn't.

Matt (01:07:02.163)
Sure. Yeah. She wants to help people.

Spencer (01:07:06.687)
DASHI

Luciano (01:07:07.086)
She did while she was yeah

Spencer (01:07:09.279)
She did that.

Matt (01:07:11.019)
Okay, she's gonna talk to Gandalf. Maybe she's gonna become a wizard.

Luciano (01:07:15.446)
Ooh, I like that. Why not? No, yeah. No, you can't because you're a myr. It's it's you have to be born like that. to demigod. Yeah.

Spencer (01:07:16.69)
No.

Matt (01:07:18.677)
Is that because women can't be wizards?

Spencer (01:07:20.307)
I don't think in the Lord of the Rings world you could become a wizard.

Spencer (01:07:27.207)
Yeah, you have to be like, you're basically like a god.

Matt (01:07:30.827)
Hey, I don't give a shit.

Spencer (01:07:34.037)
Well, Touche. I think she's going to Gandalf because, didn't she say because he wants to ask about the orcs taking the rings?

Matt (01:07:38.395)
Hahaha

Luciano (01:07:38.579)
Hahaha!

Luciano (01:07:47.318)
Yeah, it is.

Matt (01:07:49.547)
Yep.

Spencer (01:07:49.845)
So she does that. She goes and tells him to take the rings and he's like, big whoop. I already heard that part. That's why I brought you here. And he asks her to join his fellowship.

That's right. And then they start the fellowship of the finding the rings.

Matt (01:08:05.47)
And then...

Luciano (01:08:12.386)
They started a jewelry store on Etsy. So they do.

Matt (01:08:19.818)
Orcsy.

Luciano (01:08:20.916)
Artsy. It's okay. I'll allow it.

Spencer (01:08:21.397)
they know the orcs want rings so they're just filling a market. It's called supply and demand, baby, supply and demand!

Matt (01:08:24.705)
Yeah, just pump them. Yeah.

Luciano (01:08:27.21)
Yeah, that's a good plan. It's like, no, this is like a CIA plot to supply them with false ring so they can bring him back to Sauron.

Spencer (01:08:37.245)
No, it's just strictly business. They know they want rings.

Luciano (01:08:39.368)
Hahaha

Matt (01:08:40.373)
Hey, hey guys, this is a yes and podcast. Why not both?

Spencer (01:08:43.953)
Okay, yeah, and they like they suspect they like because they know what they actually want. They'll put it in the description be like one of one model What this ring is to rule them all figuratively speaking?

Luciano (01:08:44.875)
There you go. There you go.

Luciano (01:08:52.211)
yeah. We are. Yeah. Yeah. We are selling. We are selling one ring like in it's Alex.

Matt (01:08:52.373)
Yeah.

L-

Spencer (01:08:58.805)
It may bind them.

Matt (01:08:59.521)
Yeah, limited edition one of one.

Luciano (01:09:02.126)
has some very interesting and intricate carvings on the inside.

Spencer (01:09:07.825)
Only works when hot.

Luciano (01:09:09.728)
Yeah.

Spencer (01:09:12.243)
He sold separately.

Luciano (01:09:14.286)
He sold separately!

Spencer (01:09:17.397)
When in dark, it binds.

Luciano (01:09:24.856)
Yeah.

Spencer (01:09:27.743)
Perfect.

Matt (01:09:28.129)
All right, great job.

Luciano (01:09:29.294)
disappear into the crowd if you use it.

Matt (01:09:34.049)
No, I think we have no notes. You guys have answered all my questions for Lord of the Rings, the War of the Reherom. Let's review this bad boy. We still review movies in a score of S to F. S is the highest, F is the lowest. Spencer.

Spencer (01:09:37.077)
That's what game... That's what... The war in the war room. The war in the war room!

Spencer (01:09:58.485)
I like I said, I think I like this movie the most out of all of us. I'm just assuming that I don't know their ratings. don't discuss that at a time.

it probably because it it seeped on my nostalgia there were moments where I felt that like if Lord of Rings original trilogy is like 100 % of awesome Lord of the Rings perfectness and Hobbit is like 50 % Rings of the Power would be like 2 % and I'd say this is like 8 %

Matt (01:10:40.609)
Hey Spencer, can you just rank this fucking movie from ass to ass?

Luciano (01:10:42.889)
Hahaha

Spencer (01:10:44.577)
So I gotta answer all those numbers into my Lord of the Rings Nostalgia Calculator and then convert it to our S tier ranking and after doing so, bleep bleep bleep bleep bleep bleep bleep bleep bleep bleep bleep bleep bleep bleep bleep

Luciano (01:10:46.06)
Nobody wants to do math after a fucking hour of conversation.

Matt (01:11:02.817)
Great Luciano.

Luciano (01:11:05.71)
I wanted to like this movie more just because I liked Lord of the Rings as an IP.

Spencer (01:11:10.549)
Oh my God, get into it Luciano!

Matt (01:11:13.013)
Hahaha

Luciano (01:11:14.424)
Fuck off. And I just, the animation really kind of honestly took a whole, like it would take a whole tear off for me when I give my, my, my rating, but I don't know. I, I, like I said before, I liked the fact that they didn't try to tie every single beat of the story with like the existing stuff and they didn't tell a story where the world was ending and all that stuff. But.

I also thought that the story is a little like cliche laden and I like some of the characters, not all of them. And we didn't even talk about the stealth olefant, but whatever.

Spencer (01:11:56.765)
What percentage would you rank it in your Lord of the Rings nostalgia meter?

Luciano (01:12:02.661)
It's 53.7 % depending on if it's a Tuesday. My rating is different, it's logarithmic. So now I'm going to explain, I'm kidding. I'll rate it a C as well. I honestly wanted to rate it higher because I think it's a good idea and I hope they do more movies like this where it's like a side story.

Spencer (01:12:04.181)
That's high. I gave it an eight.

Spencer (01:12:09.661)
Okay. Okay. Sorry. Of course.

Matt (01:12:10.807)
I don't know.

Spencer (01:12:19.08)
Luciano (01:12:28.62)
and it doesn't have to involve everything. not everything is Skywalker and Palpatine, the sort of deal, but the animation was kind of hard and the story was kind of thin. So C for me.

Spencer (01:12:41.289)
Did the animation bother you, Matt, a lot?

Matt (01:12:44.339)
Is this just seems like when it looked like it was a Spider-Man TV show from the 1960s where the background moved instead of the characters for reasons that I understand.

Luciano (01:12:49.32)
Hahaha

Spencer (01:12:54.291)
Yeah, did you find that, I meant to ask this, that the, like it was clearly like mocapped at time, so like the movement was very like...

Luciano (01:13:01.228)
Yeah.

Matt (01:13:01.513)
Yeah. I have a specific note I wrote down that someone needs to tell them this is an animated movie, not an action, like a live action movie. Yeah.

Spencer (01:13:11.221)
Yeah, it was weird. It like, it reminded me of like, like Scanner Darkly kind of, you know, where it's like, it's, it looked like their movement was real.

Matt (01:13:16.544)
Mm-hmm.

Luciano (01:13:20.983)
For me it was just jarring like certain scenes where they would like the scene where Freckle shows up at Helm's house or whatever and he's talking and he's like blah blah. It's yeah never stopped moving and he's swaying I was like what is happening here? It is so weird Yeah, yeah

Spencer (01:13:31.04)
Yeah, yeah, it's arms if that was the scene that does the most That was the part that was the scene that stood at the mostly as well I was gonna mention it

Matt (01:13:42.987)
That's he was just, originally this was supposed to be like a, fighting game. And then so he took his animation from the character select scene and that's why he was moving. Yeah, that's why he was moving.

Luciano (01:13:50.318)
The idle animation. Yeah, I can see that.

Spencer (01:13:55.189)
There's never one phrase they say, don't put me in my jar. Don't put me in my jar. Don't put me in my jar.

Luciano (01:13:59.892)
Hahahaha!

Luciano (01:14:05.301)
Anyway, C for me.

Matt (01:14:07.489)
wow. Yeah. Great job. I will also give it to see the animation was weird. It's fine. It's not like I heard it was bad. And it's just like, it doesn't ruin the movie. It's just like, that's kind of weird shit that you forget about it. And then you watch the movie and the first half of the movie is all the cliches you could ever find role into one and the second half of the movie, they introduce a lot of cool ideas, execute on none of them. And then Hera crushes Wolf with the shield and Frey Laugh is the king.

Luciano (01:14:29.877)
Hahaha!

Luciano (01:14:35.126)
I like that he died like a little bitch baby.

Matt (01:14:37.387)
Sure. So it's a C, that's fine. Watch it. You have a decent time.

Luciano (01:14:40.119)
Meh.

Spencer (01:14:40.671)
Don't pudge me my neck. Don't pudge me my neck.

Luciano (01:14:43.104)
Yeah. Yeah, like West March men have really weak upper like parts of their body.

Spencer (01:14:48.981)
You

Matt (01:14:51.947)
It's not safe to be with smart chain. I want to go with it. that is the end of this podcast. We are going to do another podcast next week. If we ever leave this one, we, all right, let's get real for a second.

Luciano (01:14:55.49)
Yeah, West Marcher.

Spencer (01:14:58.687)
West Merchant.

Matt (01:15:08.529)
We watched Morbius.

Luciano (01:15:11.086)
no. no. My damn web.

Spencer (01:15:11.529)
We did.

Matt (01:15:12.703)
We watched M'Damn Web. M'Damn Web. And we got to finish the trilogy. We don't count Venom because Venom has too many movies and it's not as bad as these ones. We are watching Craven the Hunter, the Russell Crowe vehicle.

Spencer (01:15:16.533)
What in my damn web?

Spencer (01:15:30.485)
shit.

Luciano (01:15:34.158)
Not the Aaron Taylor, whatever his face is.

Matt (01:15:38.83)
Whatever you'll be fine Russell Crowe is to draw here

Spencer (01:15:41.013)
Listen, we don't give the audience what they need, we give them what they be craving.

Luciano (01:15:45.998)
What they deserve? Oh no. Oh no.

Matt (01:15:48.313)
No. Damn. Chris, you channeled Chris there and I hated it. So yeah, join us next week for Craving the Hunter, the 2024 Russell Crowe vehicle that stars some other people. It's bad. I'm sure it's already on streaming. You're welcome.

Spencer (01:16:04.917)
I can't wait to get angry

Luciano (01:16:07.5)
Yeah, because I don't know anything about this character. let's see.

Matt (01:16:11.617)
That's probably too much.

Spencer (01:16:13.906)
That's probably for the best. I know stuff about this character and I like this character. So that's gonna make it even worse

Luciano (01:16:18.57)
Yeah, exactly. Yeah, that's what I'm thinking.

Matt (01:16:21.889)
All right, so let's join this podcast next time and we'll watch Spencer have an aneurysm, but it'll be audio based, so who knows?

Spencer (01:16:29.077)
It's Craven time.

Matt (01:16:31.745)
You gotta stop. You gotta stop saying that.

Luciano (01:16:31.817)
no.

Spencer (01:16:33.301)
Craviest type?